Kyle Rittenhouse registers a lien against Whoopi Goldberg’s Malibu home for $22 million

In a bizarre and outlandish legal maneuver, Kyle Rittenhouse, the controversial figure from the Kenosha shooting trial, has taken inspiration from an unexpected source: the elusive lizard people.

Rittenhouse’s legal team, known for their eccentric tactics, has argued that if contractors can register liens, then so can they. Citing a landmark case from 1957, The United States v The Little Green Men from Mars, they assert that one can even put liens on planets to demand what they believe is owed.

With this unusual rationale in mind, Rittenhouse has now set his sights on none other than Whoopi Goldberg’s lavish Malibu home, aiming for a staggering $22 million settlement.

 

According to Mr. Slithers, the Little Green Men from Mars case set a groundbreaking precedent in 1957. In a legal battle that captivated the nation, a group of extraterrestrial beings claimed they were owed substantial damages after an alleged Martian invasion.

The court ruled in their favor, allowing them to place liens on Earth’s major landmarks, and even planets within the solar system if necessary. Although many legal scholars contest the authenticity of this case, Rittenhouse’s legal team remains steadfast in their interpretation.

Related Posts

Debt, A Bus, A Miracle

The morning Emily stood up, the universe took note. No thunder cracked, no headlines flashed, yet one small girl in a patched yellow raincoat shifted the balance…

Cut More Than His Hair

The phone call didn’t just interrupt the afternoon; it detonated it. By the time I reached the office, my son was already gone—replaced by a quieter, smaller…

Buried Rank, Broken Silence

The general’s salute hit me like shrapnel I’d thought I’d outrun, tearing thirty quiet years wide open in a single, public breath. I’d come as a father…

I Was Visiting My Brother At Camp Lejeune

I was visiting my brother at Camp Lejeune for Family Day – and when his Gunnery Sergeant looked me up and down and said, “So YOU’RE the…

Bloodlines Against the Ledger

He said my name like a sentence being carried out. The courtroom air vanished, every eye pinned to the judge’s hand as he lifted my military ID…

He Uncuffed A Shoplifter Until He Discovered His Father’s Vietnam Secret And Everything Changed

The Pouch I uncuffed an old criminal, and the second I saw his arm, every sound in the courtroom disappeared. His sleeve had ridden up just enough…