My Daughter Forbade Me from Attending Her Graduation Due To Her Dad’s Ultimatum

On June 1, 2022, an anonymous woman turned to the “AITA” subreddit to pen her story.

The woman had an 18-year-old daughter, who had been very close to her father during her younger years despite her parents breaking up before she was born.

Below is her full story
“I (40sF) have a daughter (18F) who I’ll call B.

When she was younger, her father (broke up before she was born) was very involved in her life and she was admittedly a “dad’s girl” but this all changed when she turned 8 and he got married.

He barely called and just abandoned her for his new family. This was obviously hard on her and she rebelled a lot. But she went to therapy and seemed good.

B has not seen him since she was 12 and he speaks to her maybe 3 times a year maximum.

When he calls, she believes he is now back in her life for good then he ghosts her for the remainder of the year.This being said ,B and I have a great relationship, we do everything together. She even refers to me as her best friend so I’d say we have a good relationship.

Recently was her graduation and I was excited. But then she came to me a week before and told me she is going to invite her dad and his son. And cos her dad doesn’t want to see me, I can’t come. B told me that was the only way he was gonna go. I angrily told her, I felt betrayed and wont forgive her for this. She just told me I have been there for many of her milestones and she wants her father to experience some too. Things got heated and we argued.

The night before her graduation, I pleaded with her but she ignored me when I spoke. And only said “I’m sorry but I’m not changing my mind. I left and cried until my sister offered to take me out during the graduation to take my mind of it and I agreed.

I woke up the next morning to my daughter bawling her eyes out. I looked at the time and realised the ceremony starts in 5 minutes. I asked B why she hasn’t left yet. B then tells me her father ditched her and isn’t answering anymore.

I hug her and tell her to make the most of her graduation. She looked shocked and asks if I’m not going to the ceremony now her father isn’t anymore .

And how it’ll be embarrassing to be the only one there without parents. I told I’m sorry that I already had plans. She then screamed and called me a bad mom.

I apologise once again and got ready to meet my sister. I chose not to go because I felt betrayed and wanted to teach her actions have consequences, even if it broke me that i didn’t go. Since B returned she hasn’t spoken a word to me. And she looks depressed and like she’s been crying for ages. I’m starting to regret not going.

My sister says I did the right thing, but one of the moms at my daughter school said she was depressed at graduation and now I feel bad that I ruined what was suppose to be a day to remember because I wanted to teach my daughter a lesson.

So AITA?”

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